Friday, June 15, 2012

MOVIES THAT I WILL MAKE MY KIDS WATCH TO TEACH THEM VALUABLE LIFE LESSONS

No kid wants to listen to their parents, so I've started a collection of movies that I'm going to use to teach my kids life lessons. This way I can say "Hey, you don't believe me? Watch some of these movies.

Can't Buy Me Love

Being popular is really important, no matter how much your parents tell you it's not.

Less Than Zero

Becoming an actor that plays someone who does a lot of drugs, might make you turn out to be someone who actually does. (Also, doing it in the hallway of someone's house, even though he's your boyfriend is not really sexy and actually kind of slutty).

The Karate Kid

Learn Karate and use it.

I had more hard hitting ones in there like: "The Accused" (nothing good come out of being the only girl late night in a bar with a bunch of townies). "Alpha Dog" (chances are - all ideas from your teenage friends are going to be retarded). "The Elizabeth Smart Story" (listen when mom tells you to stay by her goddamit!) - but Chris said I was a weirdo - so I'll save those for my "If You're Watching This I Must be Dead" videos I made for them. Tune in next week for more life lessons though movies with The LANALOGUE.