Wednesday, September 23, 2009

KCo's Corner (posted by KCo - duh)

This was suppose to be the episode that we were all waiting for…the previews of Rachael getting slammed by the press for being so thin. It turned out to be a bit of a nothing. There was a piece in The Post that called her the “pin thin” stylist. Ok big deal, she is. I’m surprised it wasn’t worse than that. However, Zoe is so devastated by it that a shopping trip ensues - of course. "Manly" Roger gets involved and insists that she hire a web consultant to help combat all of the negative online press.
We then find out that Marie Claire magazine wants to do an article on Zoe where she is styled and no one piece is over $250. That’s a challenge? Piece of cake (although, it probably was a challenge for her since I’m sure she’s never stepped foot in Forever 21 or H&M). Have no fear ... that’s where Brad came in to save the day. For once she didn’t look like Ms. Havisham. Zoe is clearly uncomfortable in front of the camera, so her team of gay stylists and Brad help loosen her up. Brad puts on a wig and pretends he is Taylor which is perfect!
Back at the ranch, Taylor is slaving away and complaining that she now doesn’t want to go to the launch party for friends Byron Williams and Tracey Cunningham’s new salon – Byron & Tracey. Brad tells her that’s why he calls her Baylor.
So off to the next episode – I know I’m behind – getting ready for the Golden Globes where she has to dress 5 people ( Debra Messing, Demi Moore, Anne Hathaway, Cameron Diaz and Eva Mendes). Will she do it?
It isn’t looking good when she tells us that she isn’t dying over anything and is getting worried. But we are relieved when she clarifies to the hoi poloi that award shows are not about fashion but rather pleasing us masses. Because “every dress has a home and I like to give it a home”. Genuis.
Cut to that ridiculous Bing! Interstitial with Zoe and Roger ordering sushi from Sushi Roku. We need to mix it up Bravo.
Then we follow Taylor who has finally brushed her hair after 4 episodes while she schleps around Beverly Hills going in and out of jewelry stores for various celebs.
We are nearing on a dress for Cameron but Zoe doesn’t like the sleeve. The masses won’t understand it so she needs to ask Karl Lagerfeld to alter it. Ok that’s scary. But he does and it’s a winner.
Drama at Eva’s house as she has a spot on her white dress but Taylor saves the day and all is well in Hollywood as Karl Lagerfeld has sent Zoe a letter on Cameron’s dress alteration and how proud he was of Cameron’s momentl

Flipping Out
Jenni is trying to work it while she’s at work and Jeff isn’t having it. Her 4 inch heels aren’t appropriate for the work site. This isn’t Melrose Place and you aren’t Amanda Woodward. If she doesn’t shape up, he will institute a dress code and she won’t like that. So to prove his point further he sends her up a ladder on a roof in 4 inch heels. This was just about the scariest thing I have ever seen on Bravo. Jenni stands firm on her position and tells us that no lesson was learned today – fashion comes first.
Jeff is dealing with a client that just isn’t paying him so in the middle of a showdown he starts to feel a little queasy and feverish. Uh oh ... this doesn’t look good he crawls into bed and we discover that Zoila apparently tried to give Jeff food poisoning by serving him several month old bacon - and boy did she bring him down. She wraps a cold washcloth on his head and secures it with duct tape…priceless.
In his compromised state, Jeff realize that he needs Jenni to do his dirty work and get their client to pay or else shut down the work site.
Jenni shuts it down and more drama for Jeff as the client goes off on Jeff after he tells her that she is having princess problems.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

LA Candy Review

While my friends are reading things like "The Help", "The Girl Who Played With Fire" and "Eat, Pray, Piss", I am reading Lauren Conrad's book LA Candy. I asked the woman in the book store for it and she plucked right it out of the teen section. Yay Me. You know what's worse then reading LA Candy? Quoting/referring to it. I have been quoting/referring it all week and acting like it's my own knowledge. For example:

  • In LA Candy one of the actresses on "LA Candy" (the reality show that is supposed to be The Hills on MTV - but since it's a novel, that trickster LC cleverly changed the names to LA Candy on PopTV) traded info on the other stars on the show for more press about herseld to the editor of "Gossip" Magazine. I told a LANALOGGER this week, that one of the tabloids does this regularly to get their information. I passed it off as insider info, but really I read it in LA Candy.

  • Someone at work this week was looking for a cool movie theater to do an event at in LA and I blurted out the Arclight Theater. Is it even a real place? I don't know, but in LA Candy they talked about it as the movie theater to go to in LA - so I threw it out there as a suggestion. I got some approving nods.

  • In LA Candy the dialogue consists of words like "WTF", "TMI" and "Kay". I started responding to all my emails with "Kay" instead of "Sounds good." or "Okay" because it just seemed easier and I'm sure people thought I was a little cooler for it.

So if you get a chance, read LA Candy. Like OMG, if you don't, you'll be like WTF and won't LOL! KAY?

Friday, September 4, 2009

It's News: but not for mensa members 9/4

Tom Hanks, the narrator and executive producer of “Beyond All Boundaries,” the 4-D cinematic experience at the National World War II Museum in New Orleans, was able to land an all star cast including Brad Pitt, Kevin Bacon, Patricia Clarkson, Kevin Connolly, James Cromwell, Viola Davis, Tobey Maguire, Gary Sinise and Elijah Wood.
(I’ll bet Kevin Connolly was a real hold out.)

Kenneth Slayton, the biological father of Jaycee Dugard, told the Daily Mirror of London that he would “love to get his hands on [Phillip] Garrido and kill him. Slayton and Terry Probyn split while she was pregnant with Jaycee. Slayton has never met his daughter.

(I’m not sure about the statute of limitations on this one, but I think 11-year dead-beat-dads forfeit their justifiable vengeance privileges.)

Jon Gosselin tells “Good Morning America” that after 10 years of marriage he is done with taking “a lot of abuse” from Kate. In other news, the father of eight was spotted guzzling vodka Red Bulls and pomegranate martinis at Stack Restaurant & Bar at The Mirage on Monday with his mother.
(That’s funny, because I’m tired of being abused by pictures of you in all those wack-ass, wannabe hip t-shirts you’ve suddenly decided to start wearing around.)

“American Idol” contestant Danny Gokey has signed a deal with 19 Recordings/RCA Nashville. He is expected to start recording after the Idols Live tour wraps on Sept.15.
(Mr. Gokey, has no one asked you to consider a stage name?)

“Project Runway” judge Tim Gunn is the subject of a brand-new Marvel comic book called the “Loaded Gunn.”
(I guess gay wasn’t enough. He’s going for super gay.)

Sasha Obama was photographed peering from behind a couch as her father finished some paperwork at the Resolute Desk in the Oval Office. The photograph is reminiscent of a series of pictures taken in 1963 showing JFK Jr. playing under the same desk while his father worked. Holy transparent attempt to link yourself to an iconic young Democratic president.
(Levi Johnston revs up his feud with the Palin family in an interview in this month’s Vanity Fair, entitled “Me and Mrs. Palin.”And the lesson is: Knock up the right chick.)