Wednesday, July 29, 2009
LANALOGGER Marissa Herbert writes
"I was at Noho Star downtown on Sat. afternoon and I look up, and he walked in! I started to freak out hoping Ed Westwick was meeting him for lunch, but instead it was some dude with white hair in running clothes. And he brought Chace a power drill...kind of weird. They had like a quick 20 min lunch and left. And yes, he is just as pretty in person, if not prettier. Seriously ridiculously good-looking."
Are you sure you weren't watching an episode of Gossip Girl? You know, the one where Nate wants to surprise Blair and hang a picture of himself in her room. Except he never owned a power drill, so he had to borrow one from the wise man with white hair who taught him that hard work is good for the soul.
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
- Ari & Lloyd. The real stars of the show. There is never a bad storyline with these two (even a couple a few seasons back when Ari helped get Lloyd back together with his boyfriend). I don't know about you, but I can't wait for Lloyd to be an agent. He'll be better than Ari.
- The E Love Triangle. I must admit, I was over E a couple of seasons ago, due to his whiny nature and super short body. Now however, I am kind of digging the - E/Sloan/Barely Legal with an Attitude Fatal Attraction - Triangle.
- Drama's quotes. Drama has had some of the best quotes of the season including "I hate when people hate me" and "E. You miniature Stud."
- Turtle & His Seth Rogen Obsession. Fact: Seth Rogen is really ugly. Fact: No one ever says it. Fact: He probably gets laid all the time. Fact: Ugly funny famous guys get laid - a lot.
- Andrew. In the end, all Ari wants to do is keep his wife happy. In steps Andrew, his wife and a 26 year old agent. What can't be good for them, is great for us.
Friday, July 24, 2009
"Honey. Can't you see mommy's busy? I'll breast feed you after." - Caroline
"Oh my god! Check out Teresa's headband." - Dina
"Oh my gawd. Did I tell you I love green? It's like, I don't know ... classy. Did I use that word right?" - Teresa
"Hurry up dude. I'm trying to distract her for as long as I can - snag the Rolex already." - Random Wanna-be Jersey Model.
"Ohh. You want to be breast fed too? As long as you call me mommy." - Caroline
"Now if I could just stab this pen in her throat, my life would be awesome." - Jaqueline
"Yo. It like takes a couple of hours to get our hair like this." - Either one of the Mangini Momma's boys.
"I swear I haven't had any Botox injections in my lips, forehead and cheeks." - Dina.
(special thanks to Christina Lazopoulos Warnick for the photos).
Kathy is going to the Apollo, so naturally she consults her only black friend, Rachael. Is funny funny or does she need to tailor her brand of funny for the Apollo’s audience? She’s use to the gays. Britney jokes? Miley jokes at the Apollo? Ummm not so much.
Kathy decides that Rachael isn’t cutting it for advice so she turns to black comedian Katt Williams. He’s the number one touring comedian in the US and has basically retired at 35. How have I never heard of this guy? This guy has a putting green, dogs, a million cars, and even a zoo – kind of MJ style at Neverland complete with weird exotic animals. He even has a red velvet rope in his house like a nightclub…Kathy’s not sure if that’s a black thing but she wants one.
Katt advises Kathy that comedy isn’t color blind. Don’t be clean. No Lohan or white people material.
Kathy is feeling like she is in over her head so she proceeds to talk to every black person she knows beginning with the one and only – TI.
They meet at Roscoe’s Chicken and Waffles. Mind you this is a mere 31 days before TI heads to jail. TI gives Tom and Tiffany nicknames, Lash Pick and Tiny.
In order to capitalize on TI’s hit Swagger Like Us, Kathy decides to go swagger…Kathy tries wearing her pants low…ahhh white lady butt crack. Swagering down Hollywood Blvd with TI…
Maggie is shocked that Kathy is going to the Apollo (the big black stage as she calls it). She is worried that she won’t have supporters there. Maggie’s African American history goes as deep as viewing”Julia” with Dianne Carroll.
Kathy tells Maggie that Al Sharpton is going to escort her to the Apollo. Maggie was not an Al fan because he was always “moaning and groaning”. He’s getting better though according to Maggie. Really?
Kathy goes to Al’s office looking for advice. She’s more nervous heading to the Apollo then being in Iraq. Al advises to be careful of race jokes and don’t use the n word. Kathy rattles a list of possible joke victims…
Jessica Simpson - nope
Octomom – blank stare
Wynona’s Diet Pills – Scooby head tilt
Ok so that little list didn’t work so well so she decides to play a game of who would you rather?
Hillary or Janet Reno?
None of the above for Al.
Beyonce or Solange?
Would rather watch Beyonce dance (Al stop lying).
Roscoe’s or Polo Lounge?
Cut to Kathy singing Ebony and Ivory while Al reminds her that the Apollo is one big stop on becoming a major A-lister.
Kathy agrees to do Al’s radio show, Keepin it Real. And guess what -no one calls in...Not even one gay guy calls in? Kathy worries that this is only a foreshadowing of her night at the Apollo…empty house.
On her way to the Apollo…she tells Tom and Tiffany that if she bombs she needs them to sing back up to Dream Girls And I’m Telling You I’m Not Going.
While she’s backstage at the Apollo she hears kids in the other room and freaks out that kids will be in the audience? Yikes…not good.
She finds out that she is performing as part of Amateur Family Night…bam back on the D List.
Al gives her a great intro basically telling the audience to be fair and kind to Kathy. What could possibly go wrong? Things are going really well for quite some time until she makes a really crude joke about lip plumping and that it looks like a female body part below the waist put on your face (I’m doing my best here people…she can be pretty hard-core).
What ensues is the most awkward moment I’ve ever witnessed…the Apollo starts to play her off stage. You see behind the scenes cameras capturing the stage manager yelling at her saying that she disrespected the house and kids were out there. She’s lucky she made it to the car alive.
Kathy immediately calls Katt Williams from the limo who pauses and says, “Oh my god that is the greatest sh&t ever….ha ha haaaaaa”.
So lesson learned…on Apollo Kids Night you’re not suppose to do p&ssy jokes
And to ensure that she hasn’t misinterpreted the situation she gets a letter from the Apollo that she is not welcome now or in the future…just add it to the long list of bans.
Until next time…
Now, I should probably mention that I am just as eager to talk with family and friends who have passed on, as I am to talk with those I can actually have a cup of coffee with. For instance, when I see a feather on the ground I never think that it comes from a shedding pigeon, but rather as a sign from my friend Lisa who passed away. I believe it is a little hello sent just for me. Pennies, feathers, butterflies, numbers are all things that at certain times I look to as a greeting from friends far away. I am also a big “sign” person. Like a sponge I absorb seemingly ordinary circumstances and believe they are signs from above.
So, it’s no surprise that I was drawn to The Psychic & Psychotic Show in the Wamu Center at Madison Square Garden. Psychic Medium John Edward teamed up with WPLJ'S Todd Pettengill to bring a packed theatre messages from those who have crossed over. Being a comedian I was more skeptical of Todd, the “psychotic” part of the duo, because I wasn’t sure how funny it would be to have him there making jokes as John gave readings. Much to my surprise they complimented each other very well. The anxious and eager audience held people of all ages who sat in anticipation that they would hear from the other side.
This was my second time at a John Edwards event. The first time I was in the front row and not surprisingly talked a lot to the people around me. I told them all about my friends who had died and expressed my hope that they would come through. I told then how each one of them had died, when, where, so that even if the show was fixed every microphone also heard my every detail. Then after the show when I wasn’t read, I blamed it on the fact that maybe I said too much and thought I jinxed myself. So, this time I went alone, and didn’t look or talk to anyone. It was like a little experiment. In fact, eerily enough the seat next to me was empty. By the way, this is one of those situations that I was talking about earlier, where someone may not think anything of it but to me, it meant someone from the other side was sitting next to me. Regardless, I didn’t get a private reading. However, long story longer, the feeling that went through me as I saw other people being read was so much more powerful than if I had been read. I mean, listen, did I want Michael Jackson to come through and tell me he is happy that I am a fan of his on Facebook? Yes, but it didn’t matter because you see, I am a believer. I already see signs and attribute them to conversations with my spiritual friends. But to watch someone who has never experienced it before, to see a mother feel some relief that her child is okay, is simply beautiful. Husbands, grandchildren, aunts, uncles, friends, even a turtle came through to people one after another. John was convincing enough with precise details about these people/animals that it seemed almost impossible not to believe. He described personalities, wardrobes, locations, personal details like medications and sexual activity of their loved ones and we watched as troubled sad people reaching for something were transformed with feelings of calmness and hope. John brought love, joy and conversations back to sorrowful hearts. He gave them a chance to talk.
Communication is an awesome thing. I encourage you never to miss out on an opportunity to talk.
Katina is one of the funniest chicks out there. I know ... I did a show with her and I was jealous she was more funny than me. For more on Katina, check out her site KATINACORRAO.com
Sunday, July 19, 2009
That concludes this weeks turn on the D-List. See you next week!
Thursday, July 16, 2009
Is it me or shouldn't Jillian be a tad perky if she was really in love with 3 guys? The dates with Reid and Kiptyn were boring and forgettable - I watched the show last night and barely remember what they did.
Here is what bothers me about Jillian and Kiptyn - she doesn't think she is good enough for him and that is kind of sad.
Reid is so super sweet and normal - and I think he would have been a good match for her. But she seems to feel like it is not there if the guy is not jumping up and screaming "I love you". With 2 other guys in the picture, that is a risky move to make after just a couple of weeks on TV!
Even more than his dramatic return, this episode was totally the Ed show. Ed really stepped it up by bringing his parents to Hawaii to meet Jillian so she could stop throwing it in his face that he didn't have a hometown date. She likes that he listens to her - blah blah. Ed also showed his fashion flair with his seersucker jacket (which I was a fan of and apparently Jillian told him he looked like an ice cream man) and 1980's bathing suit (which he clearly stole from Tom Selleck's Magnum PI wardrobe). It was also kind of nice that he came to console her after she got back from putting Reid in the limo.
One interesting theory that I read on a blog - Reid is coming back to profess his love to Jillian. She's going to pull a Brad Womack and reject both Kiptyn and Ed, but this time Jillian will give the final rose to a bachelor she has previously rejected, namely Reid.
What do you think of this theory? Any others as to what will happen at the "alter"? Will Jillian get a ring???
Check out Chris Harrison's blog - v funny - http://popwatch.ew.com/
People.com's take on it
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Monday, July 13, 2009
"So I am driving in horrific traffic with my husband on Broome Street heading into Holland Tunnel and we notice a bright yellow lamborgini next to us. As we pull up next to it we notice it is Tracy Morgan! So we HAD to say something to him. We pull the window down and tell him how much we love him and 30 Rock. He appreciated it. Then he says "Dick Cheney is Mad". Not really sure why but we laughed and that was it. Then we started to notice that so many people started to notice him. People blowing kisses, taking pictures etc. He put his thumbs up then he finally decided to the put the top of his convertible up since everyone started to notice him."
I must find out the meaning to that profound statement. Thoughts? Email us at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Friday, July 10, 2009
Queen Latifah is performing on Friday, July 10th on Good Morning America in Central Park. This is the beginning of what promises to be an incredible album launch. Please join for a free concert in Central Park, it will be a great time!
Central Park opens to the public at 6 a.m. and audience members will be permitted to enter the park starting then. Concerts are free and open to the public. Entrance is on a first-come, first-served basis. "Good Morning America" airs live from 7 to 9 a.m., with concert performances usually starting around 8:30 a.m.
Thursday, July 9, 2009
Kathy: "I'm not doing any goddam pilates - jesus h christ on the cross - pass me the wine before i slap your smart mouth".
So the big news was that the promos were totally misleading about someone who couldn't hook up in the bedroom. Big disappointment - was hoping for the "perfomance issue" episode.
Jillian and the boys frolicked around Spain and she turned down 3 of the 4 fantasy suite cards (kinda). First she met up with Kiptyn who is kinda awkward. Trista said in her blog that Kiptyn is an awkward kisser but watching this entire episode - Jillian was awkward kissing all the guys. Is it just her or the cameras?
Then a disheveled Reid (who usually looks so cute) met up to have a picnic and butcher the Spanish language - they seemed to have the most fun together. She is expecting a lot for these guys to gush their undying love and talk about proposals. When the roles are reversed though, on The Bachelor, the women are always spilling their hearts out . . . . usually to get stomped on.
On her date with Ed, Jillian just kept ragging about how much time they missed together and how she didn't get to meet his family. Jillian's plans to ''catch up'' with Ed? Well, at least she's gotten caught up with his tongue (OK - copied that from an article I read, but it's true!). When she was asking him what his family would think of her - he OF COURSE said that they would love her - what else can he say?!
You knew it was all over for Wes when he said "numero uno is most important here". Clearly NOT the "I love you" that Jillian was hoping for. They were not only unaffectionate - they were distant and he was pretty rude to her at the park.
At the Rose Ceremony, when Wes said he would be going home to have lots of sex - I hope you caught the shocked and disgusted expressions from Reid and Kiptyn - let's hope Ed's laugh was a nervous laugh and not a "I hear ya Buddy" laugh - or Jillian will be standing alone at the end. She should not have even walked him out of the Rose Ceremony - his limo interview was so crude.
After this week, the chemistry with Kiptyn is cooling down and Ed and Reid seem to be destined for final two. Onto Hawaii for more one on one dates. . . Don't they meet her parents? I thought that was usually at the end but maybe they didn't want to or maybe the show doesn't want to go back to Vancouver again.
Check out Chris Harrison's blog - http://popwatch.ew.com/popwatch/2009/07/chris-harrison-blogs-the-bachelorette-episode-8.html?xid=rss-feed-todayslatest-%27Bachelorette%27+host+blogs+ep+8
And Trista's blog - http://www.eonline.com/uberblog/watch_with_kristin/b133013_trista_sutter_blogs_about_bachelorette.html
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
- Brooke Sheilds actually said the names "Prince, Paris and Blanket" with a straight face.
- The lame Tweets from the Celebrity Community while the service was going on - For example: "I'm starting with the woman in the mirror. Bless you Michael." - by Pam Anderson.
- The Jackson brothers seeing this as an opportunity for a 2009/2010 Reunion Tour, in Vegas no less.. Really?
- Germaine singing way out of tune. I'm sure the brothers are rethinking that tour.
- Michael's coffin on stage during the concert (let's call it what it was, I'm sure there will be CDs available). Did anyone else find this creepy? Only thing that was creepier:
- Corey Feldman dressed as MJ.
- No wait. Scratch that. Joe Jackson getting a standing ovation. Creepiest.
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
I couldn't find a more perfect picture if I tried. This is exactly how I pictured Bret Michaels: Skull shirt. Red plastic cup in the middle of the day. Tour bus. Fake tan. Leather wristlet. Ripped forearms. Standing next to a fan with an "I Want You to Want Me." T-shirt.
LANALOGGER Danielle Papandrea writes
"This picture was taken at the Comcast Center in Mansfield MA. I think it was a Poisson, def Leppard and Cheap Trick concert. You wouldn't catch me dead at one of those shows."
Oh Danielle. I disagree. You would catch me alive (and dead) with my top off just to get a glimpse at those forearms.
Monday, July 6, 2009
Thursday, July 2, 2009
Teabagging, Fisting, Bravolebrity, ContraDICKS & Angry Badger.
1) Dress immature
Wednesday, July 1, 2009