Thursday, February 26, 2009

The Lost Boys (with ryan buynak and esteban ruben roman) Please see below photo of Ryan with Matt Damon. Can you guess which one is Ryan?

Lost Heroin.

Not only was Ben present when Locke died…Ben murdered Locke! OMG! We didn’t see that whopper of a plot changer coming!

I know we say this every week, but this week we mean it: This week’s episode of Lost, titled The Life and Death of Jeremy Bentham, was the best episode of the season, maybe of the whole damn series. Okay, at least top five. The Constant was the best episode of the damn series. But this one is up there.

This episode was like a Tarantino-verison of Lost. And like, Pulp Fiction, the story seems to jump back and forth. It starts on the Island with a resurrected Locke, and then the episode jumps with Locke into the Tunisian desert (2007) and goes along for Jeremy Bentham’s wild ride, and ends back on the Island, in god-knows-what time(s) with the actor who plays every evil muslim dude in the movies showing Locke Ben’s unconscious body.

Widmore gives Locke a few lines about the Island’s inhabitants used to be his people, but when we saw him, at seventeen, he seemed like a grunt doing grunt work. No? Widmore also talks about the fantastic possibility of time, and how Locke is special, and how Ben is the bad one, not him. Widmore is the one who gives Locke the name of Jeremy Bentham. Then comes Abaddon, the Metatron for Widmore, to chaufuer Bentham around like George Carlin in Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure.

Bentham visits Sayid in the Republica Dominicana, who is building houses, probably out of bones, who also says that he was done being manipulated by Ben. Bentham visits Walt in New York. Imagine being Walt, a teenager in New York, you come out of school and see John Locke across Lexington. Walt didn’t seem surprised to see him, actually, Locke mentions this fact. Walt then mentions a dream he had of Locke on the Island in a suit. Bentham visits Hurley in the asylum. It was so funny that Hurley thought Locke was dead. So much damn foreshadowing. Bentham visits Kate, and she gives him some BS about love, like she knows what that is. She is a floozy with eyes for Sawyer and Jack. When Kate was reciting the diatribe, Ruben spit at the television for some reason that he never mentioned aloud. Bentham visits his old girlfriend’s grave (did she really die from a brain aneurism?). Bentham visits Jack, inadvertently. He runs from whomever killed Abaddon, and gets into a serious car accident and ends up in Jack’s hospital. Then after Jack verbally abuses him, Bentham goes and purchases an extension cord with which to hang himself.

Either Ben is evil or he is not. He is either manipulating everyone for his own egotistic benefit or he is doing for the Island. Ben popped a few bullets into Abaddon, did Ben also kill Nadia, Sayid’s special lady friend? In every scene with Ben, he has this look in his eyes like he is a conniving vulture. When Locke tells him about Jin, he squints and you can see the lightbulb going on inside his head. And then after talking Locke down from the ledge, Ben seems alright at first, until Locke mentions Eloise Hawking, then Ben goes crazy and strangles Locke to death. He makes it look like a suicide.

It’s hard to make sense of it all. Ruben still thinks Ben is good at heart. Ryan now thinks like he thought in the beginning when Ben was Henry Gale, that Ben is evil, like Satan. But does that make Widdmore good? If in fact it was Ben that shot Abaddon to “save Locke,” then why did Ben kill Locke? Ryan cannot for the life of him wrap his head around any benevolent reason for Ben’s doings.

In a few huge sidenotes, leftover morsels needing to be discussed…

The plane is on ground, seemingly intact. As Cesar and Ilana comb the Hydra station, we are left to assume that they are in a different timeline(s) than that of Jin and Volkswagon Bus DHARMA. Also, what Island was Locke looking at when he was on the beach talking to Sayid captor, Ilana? Was John and company on the smaller Island adjacent to the main Island, Jacob’s Island? Since everyone seems to be alright, and the plane in one piece, did Frank LAPIDUS put her down nice and safe? Ilana said that the pilot and some lady ran off with the other outrigger, which, by the way, was already there when they got there.

We shall call them, the other folks whom we don’t quite know yet, the Newbies. What timeline(s) are resurrected Locke and the Newbies in?

That should be the name of a punk rock band: Resurrected Locke and the Newbies!

That’s all we got this week, folks. Between this week’s episode and last week’s, the Lost Boys are tuckered out. We may have miss some things, but who cares, right? All of us out there, in Lanalogue cyberspace land, know that this mere television is like a 100-meter dash multiplied by 108 days.

Take that, Quentin.

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